They should ban measuring tapes.......

hmmmm what to say its been a couple weeks since my last blog.
Weight as of last friday 16th was 199, pounds lost -1, which was a nice because week 2 can be a let down after a big week like week 1. The body readjusts to the exercise and shortage of food. My weekend was less than steller for eating...lets just say allotted points a day with weight watchers is around 30 for my weight category and i had 2 days of 50 plus!!!!!

This week has been a struggle mostly because i am hungry all the time and with my hypoglycemia issues, not eating isnt really an option, so its figuring out what fills you up longer for less calories!
I was falling into the pity category and feeling sorry for myself..really being the victim and that crap only my fat ass put me where i am today. Lucky or unluckily depending on how you choose to see it, i had a bit of a wake up call tonight. I had to be fitted for a bridesmaid dress tonight and after being measured they decided to enlighten me with the fact that i am a size 24!!!! and to add salt to the wound tell me that i have to pay another $30 for being "plus sized"!! wow those ladies know how to make you feel good about yourself!!. Well maybe this happened to wake me up to the fact that i really dont have a choice anymore reagrding my weight...its something i just have to beat, to overcome to let go!(literally) I am no longer "chubby" volumtpous" or "curvy", I am now just plain ol' fat or obese to be politically correct.
The only comfort i can find in this experience is now knowing i have a time line the wedding date is may 16th and i have 3 .5 months to do some damage...wish me luck!

Here we go!

Well today is the first day of the rest of my life ....how many times have I said this? Probably 10 times in the last 10 years. Why do I feel like this time its different? Well for one I am blogging thanks to my friend Linds telling me about it as a good outlet for sharing feelings and most importantly coming to a breaking point of hitting 200 pounds and actaully feeling heavy! I have been somewhat chubby my whole life, however, I know feel heavy and this is alarming. I never really felt disadvantaged by my weight until the last year. I no longer go 1 min without thinking about my weight and more importantly now my health. I feel myself being limited by my weight and unable to live it to the fullest and this i'm sure allows me to loose out on life!
I watch my brother who is 5 years my senior and over 300 pounds, die a little more everyday due to his weight. I feel that if I can get myself on track that would help him out immensely. I know this is not my burden per say, but this responsibility gives me motivation....is this selfish?...I think not, because in the end if it works.....it wont have been in vain!!!

Things I am doing to succeed: Food journal, weight watchers and daily exercise (min 30mins)
Types of exercise: 2-1 hour classes a week at the gym, 2-3 days a week on machines at the gym ( ie treadmill, elliptical) and hiking with my doggie (weekend).

starting weight: 205
week 1 weight in 200!!!

I feel like all of my attempts to loose weight before as not failures, but learning experiences. Most smokers take an average 8-10 attempts to quit smoking, therefore, I see this as a education in what not to do again. Positive thinking is something that does NOT come naturally to me, but i must be for this to work. Of course there will be speed bumps, but i cannot allow a road block.